How do you say I LOVE YOU?

Love can be expressed in so many different ways. Actually, experts tell us that there are 5 love languages. Here they are in a nutshell:

~the gift language: I know I am loved because you gave me something

~the physical touch language: I sense you love me because you give me a hug, or hold my hand, or simply touch my shoulder

~the quality time language: you are choosing to spend your precious time doing something special with me, and that’s how I know you love me

~the words of appreciation language: You say things to me that cause me to realize that you love me

~the works of service language: when you fix the washing machine, it tells me that you love me.

We are doing a kind of marriage seminar at my church and we have examined each one of these love languages. We also asked ourselves questions to figure out what our own dominant love language is. Interesting… I am a words- of- appreciation-kind-of-girl.

Much more useful in life is to discover what other people’s love language(s) is/are and communicate with them accordingly. Think about it: Since my love language is “words of appreciation,” I might show you my love with little notes and letters, and I might tell you how much you mean to me and what a great job you did yesterday when the kids were yelling at each other. But if the dominant thought in you concerning love is that you are loved when you get something from someone, these words won’t affect you as much as if I had bought you flowers, or a good book, or a car…

It’s like giving someone a CD of your favorite music band. It might be what you thought would be the perfect gift because you love that band, but it might mean nothing to the receiver of the gift—or worse, he might really dislike it.

If I want to reach someone’s heart with my message of love, it would behoove me to figure out what he/she perceives as such. I will touch them deeply, and my message will be clear: I love you!


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