You Ugly Fat Cow

Many, many of us women spend most of their waking hours thinking about dieting. Or losing weight. Thinking about trimming fat off of their bodies so they can be more pleased with the reflection in the mirror.

Many, many men spend most of their waking hours thinking about sex and how good their bodies might look to prospective girlfriends/wife. Thinking about what to do to tone up, bulk up, firm up so they can be more macho.

So we work out and we pay attention to what we eat and don’t eat. And most of us don’t get permanent results if that’s all we do. Because it’s all backwards.

Life happens from the inside out.

But we want to do things backwards, looking for the outs before we get the ins. Investing into changing our inside first by nourishing our minds, cherishing our souls seems a bit seems lame. Too labor intensive. Stupid.

Yet come to think of it, controlling and growing our inside life in the right direction is truly the first pillar of change. Because we won’t ever live above our thoughts, no matter what. And this one pillar, it is the one that will cause all other pillars to line up just right. And only when this one pillar is well established can we actually change the shape and health of our bodies.

Because everything in life starts and happens from the inside out.  

In my career as a personal trainer, I once had a lovely client who saw herself as an “ugly fat cow.” Every time she saw herself in my wall-to-wall mirror, she pointed her chin to the mirror and say, “you ugly fat cow!” At least three times a session. Sometimes more.

You ugly fat cow.

You ugly fat cow.

You ugly fat cow.

She said it. She believed it. She was it in her own mind.

And as long as that is where her mind was, her body never changed. No matter how hard she worked. No matter how little she ate. Nothing changed.

You ugly fat cow.

As I gained her confidence, I began to talk to her about her thoughts and her speech. We eventually got to the place where she was forbidden to say “you ugly fat cow.”

And then she began to believe me.

She changed her mind about herself. She changed her thoughts.

And her body changed.

Cultivating Thankfulness with Ann

one thousand#618 A job to go to this morning

#619 The smell of lavender 

#620 His Word in my heart

Sometimes, I link up with any or all of these wonderful writers: Hearts 4 HomeSDG,  Hearts Reflected, WLW, EOA, Things I can’t say, Growing HomePlay Dates with GodMonday Musings, Hear it on SundayInspire Me Monday, Tell me a Story, The Better Mom, a Mama’s StoryInto the WordIn and Around Mondays,OYHT, Gratituesday, Titus2Tuesdays, ExtraordinayLessons from IvyDenise in BloomSweet BlessingsFaith Filled Friday, Finding JoyWholeHearted Home, Mom’s the Word,



  1. so true! so true!
    we look at the outside of every thing and judge
    we work on the outside of a lot of things so we will be judged favorably – by others who are “outsiders”; little depth, superficial and artificial yet they are not happy… no matter how well the outside looks

    thank you for sharing your insights!


  2. Thanks for this admonishment today! It’s kind of like cleaning house – When we clean the drawers and closets, it’s not noticeable to most people. They will just notice whether or not we’ve “picked up” or cleaned the bathrooms, or done the dishes or vacuumed.
    When we clean from the “inside” to the “outside” – the drawers and closets AND the bathrooms and picked up the clutter, then house is really clean! But it can’t get to “really clean” until we do the “inside” work.


  3. Unfortunately sometimes those words we say to ourselves were given to us by our parents and that message given in childhood is really hard to erase. I’ve been working on getting rid of them all my life.


  4. How sad that this woman saw herself as an “ugly fat cow.” Thank God you were able to help her see this. We are children of the King of kings, made exactly the way he designed us. We should be rejoicing!


  5. Powerful. And so very true. And isn’t it amazing how your loved ones can tell you how gorgeous you are, but you refuse to believe. But then a stranger or acquaintance – or trainer – tells you that, and it starts to change your mindset. We do seek validation from others. But we really need it from ourselves.


  6. It’s ourselves that end up being our biggest roadblocks, aren’t we? Those negative self-thoughts that make so much harder to succeed. This was an excellent look into the power of self-image.


  7. Thoughts and words DO matter! I strongly believe in the Law of Attraction. We attract what we put out, so it’s important to know and control what we’re putting out there, for ourselves and others.

    I hope you will link up with me at for my TGIF Blog Hop!

    Have a great weekend!



  8. I SO agree! In order to instigate change, one must work from the inside out. Or the changes are purely cosmetic. Easily wiped away and forgotten. Thank you for your insight today!


  9. This is the story that made me really question what it is in me that causes me to not make healthy choices or to stick to the ones I believe in. Thank you so much Barb for allowing your journey to intersect with mine once again. It is helping me to get more in line with what Jesus has for me.


I would love to hear your reaction to this post.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s